Drug Abuse and Trauma.

Contributed by

Dr Arif Magrabi Khan

CONSULTANT PSYCHIATRIST

According to WHO website “The International day against drug abuse and illicit trafficking”  is marked on 26 June every year to strengthen action and cooperation in achieving a world free of drug abuse”.

For the year 2024 the theme is “The evidence is clear: invest in prevention”.

Prevention can be done if we clearly know causes included causes deeply embedded and rarely discussed. 

Yes this is a story of trauma but that does NOT mean , no good things happened in the life of said person.

We all faced, and will face challenges in future too, but ignoring or running away from challenges of life adds to our problems and never solves them. 

It is pertinent to mention that gender, places, ages in the story have been changed to protect privacy of family, even though,

I am sharing this inspiring story after permission from family, exactly after 10 years of drug abuser staying clear of drugs, and family members accepting life as it is, not comparing themselves with others who are financially stable and physically healthy.

This  story is an attempt to understand and help others.

So here is how it developed, step by step.

1. Parental discord, not uncommon though in healthy individuals who do not carry forward trauma of parental discord. But domestic violence does affect the sufferer and children in severe and harsh ways.  Domestic violence is common in JK too but not today’s topic of discussion.

2. Father thought his students who due to his hard work became famous doctors, academicians, police officers are his REAL ASSETS. Unfortunately let down by most. Another quality which is considered a liability in the world was Honesty, and not taking bribes. Believed GOD will take care of most needs. He gave ideas way ahead of time, which are now hailed in 2024.

3. Mother passionate, educated and obsessed with helping relatives at the cost of own children and family, not always but many times, her helping nature towards relatives did not mean she neglected her own family, in fact sold lot of jewelry for construction of a new house as old one was considered unfit by “Son in laws and close relatives”, went from pillar to post for sake of getting GOVERNMENT JOBS for children.

4. Parents had high hopes of children who excelled till 12 th grade, they thought they will become doctors, engineers on their own , get a government job, marry and will have children as was the case till 1990 in Jammu Kashmir.   Children did get highly reputed degrees from prestigious universities of our country but had to spend a lot of time away from home, in the heart of their hearts missing parents and siblings. One professional could not get a government job and thus became a drug abuser. Kindly understand nothing justifies choosing drugs over life. Drugs are a temporary escape.

This complicated already existing problems, fathers blood pressure became uncontrollable, sadly society still treats drug abusers as some SINNERS and do not consider it a medical condition just like diabetes or hypothyroidism. Finally he died of a massive cardiac arrest, after which most of relatives stopped visiting them. They were seen as some sort of outcasts. Even the death of father was firmly and harshly blamed only on him which increased his feelings of guilt.  His negative behaviors  before rehabilitation were slowly getting ingrained into the minds of other siblings, especially brother. One sister in the family, such a kind soul, was diagnosed with kidney disorder , had to undergo two dialysis in a week. This gave emotional pain and a feeling of helplessness among other family members. Three years to find a donor and died three years after diagnosis. This devastated the whole family. Old wounds which were getting healed got fresh again. Another sister was diagnosed with the first stage of cancer after for two years no doctor found cause for her pain in hands and lower abdomen.  Surgery was thankfully successful, and now she is a living inspiration for all around her, but still society accepts her as just a victim rather than a survivor. Again this gave severe emotional pain to all family members. Another brother who also could not get a permanent government job, developed all negative behaviors like use of foul language first with family members and then at work place, also suffers from anger bursts which involves breaking items purchased by him like TV, DVD, Laptop.  Now he often rues opportunities he got abroad to work and live a settled life.  He is doing all except taking drugs. Mother, although highly educated, did not know how to react. She was literally bewildered     Silver lining. Drug abuser in the family after rehabilitation and studying various religions, not only his own now such a gentle soul, literally cannot kill a fly or never raises his voice in a harsh tone . He developed such an aversion to drugs that even if somebody smokes he vomits.  I as a counselor  pray that his doctors help him in future and God keeps him on the right path. Doctors giving a personal touch to treatment is important like sending a Happy Eid message !   All family members now realized “how their emotional and physical pain is less as compared to others, they understand God has given them food to eat, house to live, and get rest”.  But as we all know healing is not a one time process but a continuous effort, a journey and not a fast reaching destination.

All of them are doing well now in 2024.  Just to remind you that both brothers work in reputable places, mother teaches Urdu to kids in the neighborhood for free, in addition they have one interest that is common helping drug abusers. Why am I sharing this? Just to make all of you realize how drug abusers are fighting on so many fronts, not just the addiction of drugs itself. The least we can do is not belittle their efforts and mock them. 

Remember all drug abusers  will have an emotional story to tell, please show respect and empathy for them, and help them in getting medical help. This is a story of just one drug abuser, imagine how others became drug abusers? It is important when we take drug abuse we also talk of family and society. I am of the firm opinion that in places like JK and Punjab, mosques, temples, gurudwaras must function as community help centers to fight drug abuse and spread awareness on drug abuse. It is impossible for government hospitals or doctors to all, society must act in unison. Author can be mailed at arifmaghribi@yahoo.com